Maybe this is because I keep moving. Or maybe this is why I have to keep moving.

I seem to have this knack of distancing myself from people every so often, and i don’t know anymore if it’s healthy or not and whether it’s a personality trait or if it’s a self-inflicted expression of shame or guilt.

I don’t know what or where home is anymore.


whatever wherever whenever whoever

so much
of us are broken into bits
a tragedy waiting to unfold
and yet
undeniable bliss when alone

i’ll be
whatever wherever whenever whoever
you need
together apart brightness or the dark
whatever wherever whenever whoever
you need

so much
deny neglect ignore the itch
a miracle waiting to unfold
and yet
unforgiving sadness when alone

why push?

First, it’s easier to do because it only consists of a gentle movement of the palm as if to say enough, goodbye.

Second, separation is  a more practical reality–we will always have to face the truth of having to say goodbye several times during the course of our lifetimes.

Third, there is more feeling, or rather, lack of it thereof, from the distance you create, and therefore less burden in the long run.


And all the tower came crashing down, the blocks collapsing in a pile of rubble. The edifice once stood tall and sturdy but it already had termites eating it from the inside, laying down the initial dominoes that would fall one against the other until the building finally weakened, swayed, and fell away, returned to its original state–dust and nothing.


I write down words to muffle the screams

and helpless, slip away in between

yet often i think i feel too much.

I long consumed the spaces within,

freezing silence, leaving no room but

written out words and muffled down screams.

lone wanderer in search of meaning,

who cowers away from human touch–

fall helpless; slip away in between.

If only I knew how to simply  be;

to shoulder the weight of the grim truth

and write down words in muffled screams.

but how long will cold mortality,

sad melodies and lost moments haunt?

the helpless slip away in between

Give bits, then pieces, then all of me.

I can’t tell how I miss you this much

I’ll write down words to muffle the screams

while helplessly slipping in between.